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Do You Believe That You Are a Failure?

What makes someone a failure? What makes them a success? How do you know when you are either/or?

This post is based upon a conversation I was having a few years ago with a co-worker of mine. She was telling about a lady that would continuously label herself as a failure in life.

The conversation at that time revolved around this person's insistence on pointing out that she was a failure and how frequently she would repeat this to her officemates.

This conversation got me thinking... what actually makes someone a failure?

As my co-worker continued to explain, she stated that the person felt like a loser mostly because things had not worked out in her favor, which of course, got me thinking even more.

Is success or failure simply rely on whether or not things go the way you want them to go? Seems a bit oversimplistic to me. Not to mention that it leaves so much space for things to turn out in a way that makes one feel like a failure.

In other words, with this type of thinking, it leaves a very broad range of options for failure with a very slim range for success.

As I saw it at that time, this person saw things like this?

Success = everything going my way

Failure = anything else

Seem harsh to me but it definitely propelled me towards creating my own definition about what I consider to be success or failure.

Now, I am sure that this person did not see things that simplistically. I hope not at least. I am pretty sure that if things turned out even remotely close to what she had planned, that she would be pretty ok with these outcomes.

This post is not really about outcomes though. It's about the definitions that we live with in our heads.

So, if you will, walk with me through this little activity.

What actually makes someone successful?

The answers to this question vary wildly depending on who you ask.

(or is it whom? anyway)

Do you define success by someone being a success at EVERYTHING? WOWZERS!

Do you define success as someone being a success at something?

Do you define success as a person who is courageous enough to truly chase what it is that they want out of life?

Is it simply based on outcomes?

On finances alone?

On looks alone?

The answers to these questions can provide us with a lot of clarity and insight about the nature of success or better yet feeling like we are successful.

What's the point you ask?

Well, our definition of success or failure can be useful or detrimental to living a fulfilled life.

I have known plenty and I mean plenty of people who have what would traditionally be seen as success and still feel like failures in life.

Let's take this activity one step further...

What is your definition of being a failure?

Is your view of failure like the lady in our story? Anything that ends up with things not going the way you planned ends with you being a failure.

Can you fail at accomplishing your goals and still be a success?

Can your life take an entirely different direction than you had intended without you feeling like a failure?

Does being a success or failure in life have anything to do with goals and goals achievement?

Is it more about what you represent than what you achieve?

I think these are important questions to ponder as you make the decision and begin on your journey of living an enriched life.

Well I think we've done enough mental exercises for today. In the meantime, always remember to...


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